


breathing with ben and gasping for air

by whatiwroteinink



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety Attacks, Brotherly Affection, Brotherly Bonding, Brothers, Canonical Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Klaus Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Snapshots, get ready for a painful one boys, i'll really cry, if you make this out as romance i'll cry, its gonna be multi chapter, short chapters sorry not sorry, well its mostly hurt not a lot of comfort
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-12
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2019-11-15 21:20:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18081113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whatiwroteinink/pseuds/whatiwroteinink
Summary: He knew Ben would be there when he woke up. He always was.--Snapshots of Klaus with Ben over the years, in which at one second his brother is there and the next he is not.





	1. before ben was gone

_ One breath in, one breath out. _

Klaus stared directly at the wall in front of him, his breathing shallow and eyes wide.

_ One breath in, one breath out. _

The dead were clamoring all around him, sobbing and screaming in languages he couldn’t understand and some he could but didn’t want to hear. 

He really needed another fix. 

_ One breath in… one breath in… one… _

“Klaus, are you okay?” Ben asked. Klaus didn’t know how long he had been standing there.

He opened his mouth, but words didn’t come out. Just gasped breaths, in and in and in and in. 

“Shit, okay,” Ben murmured, sitting down directly next to his brother. “How many are there?”

Klaus shook his head. He didn’t want to tell him. Didn’t want to tell his brother- his sweet, perfect brother, Ben- that there were too many ghosts to count. 

“A lot,” he murmured, closing his eyes as though it would shut them out. It never did.

_ Klaus! _

_ Help us, Klaus! _

_ Ramène-moi! _

_ Tell them for me-  _

_ Dis-lui- _

_ Mia moglie- _

_ My grandma-  _

_ Klaus!  _

_ Nipi im- _

_ Klaus Klaus Klaus KLAUS! _

“-okay? Klaus. Hey, hey, come back to me, I’m right here,” Klaus heard Ben saying, and he dimly registered a hand on his arm. Ben rubbed soothing circles into his back with the pads of his thumbs, and Klaus felt safer. He curled tighter into his brother’s side, falling into his touch and letting the sound of his heartbeat and his breathing drown out the screams of the dead. 

“Want me to sing to you?” 

Klaus nodded, his body sagging in relief as he let Ben’s gentle voice wash over him. It was some meaningless piece of choral shit- Ben was always picking up the classics from Vanya- but it was slow and soft and sweet, and Klaus fell into an uneasy sleep. He knew Ben would be there when he woke up. He always was. 


	2. a.d. (after death)

Klaus woke up alone. His hair and forehead were damp with sweat and the lights felt far too bright. 

“Ben?” he murmured groggily, blinking his eyes against the sun streaming in through the window. 

No response. 

He sat up and looked around.

No Ben.

_ Oh yeah. _ Ben is dead. 

Without Ben, Klaus’s small dark bedroom was even smaller and darker. It looked empty and Klaus felt emptier. He rolled out of bed and sighed. 

He walked to his desk and picked up a rubix cube. He fiddled with it a few moments, but everything he did just seemed to muddle it more.

_ I’ll have Ben solve it,  _ he thought.  _ Ben loves puzzles. _

_ Oh yeah.  _ Ben is dead. 

Klaus went to take a bath. He closed his eyes and choked on salty tears. Ben was dead, and all Klaus had was himself. 

**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments are appreciated!! follow me on tumblr @and-its-only-us. and this will have at least three chapters, who knows how long overall though.


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